Haiku For The Financial Meltdown

The Crash In 153 Syllables

by Stephen Von Worley on August 18, 2009

Now that our little macroeconomic bobble is like, so totally “over”, I’d like to memorialize it with a grid of nine haiku (in non-rhyming 5-7-5 format):

Obama eases
fat cash for lemon Chrysler
Hyundai here I come
Goldman Sachs trader
once mastered the universe
hung by toenails soon
eviction notice
to refrigerator box
or parents’ basement?
systemic failure
food cigarettes guns ammo
not a wingnut see?
traffic seems lighter
underemployed “consultants”
booze and Judge Judy
dental agony!
root canal for “favors”, please!?
do it like that unghh
goddamn repo man
fed dog and took my plasma
smarter than I thought
line worker sobbing
fine Bangladeshi craftsmen
sewed hems of his pants
last storefront emptied
past midnight sneaking landlord
gas can in his hands

Print these out, store them somewhere safe, and show them to your grandchildren, as evidence of the trevails that you endured back in ’09!

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